Do you ever have those days where you wake up and you're getting ready for the day, and then something really stupid comes up that begins to delay you, and in your lack of patience in the busy routine of the morning, you do something rash to remedy or ignore the problem so you can be on your way? Well, I did that today. I was moving along, getting all ready to go to church this morning, and as I was grooming myself in front of the mirror, I just had a big chunk of hair that stood straight out. It wouldn't obey me in any way this morning. My desire to be done struggling with my hair was too great, and I just chopped off the part that was sticking out. It will never stick out again!!!! HA! ....We'll see tomorrow morning after I've showered again if that was a good decision or not...
Today, I got to teach a Sunday School lesson. I love teaching. I just can't help but do it in almost every situation I am in. I have an insatiable drive to teach everyone anything I know that they may not know. In return, they usually teach me something they know that I don't know! I just can't imagine how anyone can come across a new little nugget of knowledge and not want to make sure that everyone else knows it too. I just love it when people know stuff! So today, I was able to teach on the subject "What role does agency have in learning the gospel?" I spent most of the lesson correcting two vital misnomers in the Church that I really wish didn't exist...because they set askew our beliefs about agency (the ability to choose). I wish to share my thoughts on the subject with you, if that's alright.
In the book of Moses, we read: "And I, the Lord God, spake unto Moses, saying: That Satan, whom thou hast commanded in the name of mine Only Begotten, is the same which was from the beginning, and he came before me saying--Behold, here am I, send me, I will be thy son, and I will redeem all mankind, that one soul shall not be lost, and surely I will do it; wherefore give me thine honor. But, behold, my Beloved Son, which was my Beloved and Chosen from the beginning, said unto me--Father, thy will be done, and the glory by thine forever. Wherefore, because that Satan rebelled against me, and sought to destroy the agency of man, which I, the Lord God, had given him, and also, that I should give unto him mine own power; by the power of mine Only Begotten, I caused that he should be cast down. And he became Satan, yea, even the devil, the father of all lies, to deceive and to blind men, and to lead them captive at his will, even as many as would not hearken unto my voice."
So, in this war in heaven against Heavenly Father's plan and Lucifer's plan, there were two options given us. We were able to choose. Lucifer, and those who chose his plan, were cast out because he sought to destroy the agency of man. Now, ask any child (and nearly any adult) in the Church, and they will describe to you that Satan wanted us to come to earth, and that he would force us to do what was right so we could all go back to the Celestial Kingdom to be united with our Father once more.
WRONG.
So, I had two volunteers come up, and gave them each a large stack of books. I set two books fairly far apart from each other, and asked them each to make an archway out of the books by stacking each one of them face up atop of each other. For the boy, I told him that as he was using his agency to choose to attempt at making this archway, that I had a rule that if he ever messed up, I would slap him on the back of the hand. As I held my hand steadily over his hands, he sweat all over the place trying to put it together, but impressively, he never made a mistake, so I didn't have to slap him. I told the girl that, for her, I was eliminating all consequences of agency, and that she just needed to make the archway as fast as possible, without worrying about being slapped if she made a mistake. Each time she was about to finish her archway, however, I knocked half of it down so she'd have to try again. She was mad! ;) It was quite fun.
This was to illustrate to them that consequences are not just bad things. All good things that come of agency are consequences as well. Since I had eliminated all consequences of agency for her, I had eliminated the ability for her to enjoy a finish project after deciding to make the archway. THIS, in fact, was Satan's plan.
You see, we, as children of the Almighty God, have a great power within us. That power is the ability to choose something and then have it. Satan never could have dreamed of having the power to force us to do what was right. There was just no possibility. Rather, to destroy our agency, his blanket statement that "surely [he would] do it" was stating that when we came down to earth, it didn't matter WHAT we did, we would go back to the Celestial Kingdom in the end. You see, without consequences existing for any action, agency becomes meaningless. This is why God must be a just God. It's the only way our agency would mean anything!
We see this pattern of Satan trying to eliminate consequences even in the very next verses: "And now the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field which I, the Lord God, had made. And Satan put it into the heart of the serpent, (for he had drawn away many after him,) and he sought also to beguile Eve, for he knew not the mind of God, wherefore he sought to destroy the world. And he said unto the woman: Yea, hath God said--Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden? (And he spake by the mouth of the serpent.) And the woman said unto the serpent: We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden. But of the fruit of the tree which thou beholdest in the midst of the garden, God hath said--Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die. And the serpent said unto the woman: Ye shall not surely die."
Satan tried to convince her there would be no consequences (at least bad ones) for partaking of the forbidden fruit. But, we learn from Moses 4:11-13, 28 that there were not only bad consequences for this action, but there were great consequences from this as well. As we can see, choice is what allows consequences to come into our lives, which mean that we learn and we are changed. This must mean that we can never learn anything by doing nothing.
In Ether 12:6, we are told one of the vital things that must happen to us in order for us to gain more knowledge: "And now, I, Moroni, would speak somewhat concerning these things; I would show unto the world that faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith."
It is apparent that when deep trials come upon us, we are given a great opportunity to move past disappointment and find a significant growth in faith and knowledge.
But there is another meaning to a "trial of faith." I think too many times we think of this phrase as something where we are acted upon. But what about acting? You have much greater power to cultivate faith in yourself than anyone else does trying to cultivate it in you. You can instigate a trial of faith...you just test your faith! Find a scripture, a phrase, a suggestion from a leader...take something you've learned in the setting of the Church or the Gospel, and put it to the test! As you create your own trials of faith every day, you will receive witnesses every day (and you may be able to avoid otherwise necessary trials of faith to be conflicted upon you...).
As it says in 2 Nephi, "And the Messiah cometh in the fulness of time, that he ma redeem the children of man from the fall. And because that they are redeemed from the fall they have become free forever, knowing good from evil; to act for themselves and not to be acted upon."
I know that if it had not been for Jesus Christ, our agency would have been destroyed. Because of the fall of Adam and Eve, we were all doomed to fall, to become corrupted, and live as devils...no matter whether we chose to do good or evil things. We could have reaped no consequences of our behavior; there was no choice but to die physically and spiritually. But, because of His Atonement, our agency has not been destroyed. Because of Him, we can choose anything we want, and have them in the end.
I hope you know that there is nothing you can't do. Truly. Doctrinally, this is true. Search your life, and figure out what you want most. Then, know that you will have it.
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